In the wild, unpredictable world of professional wrestling, promoters walk a razor-thin line every single day—booking the right matches, managing budgets, promoting events, and perhaps most challenging of all, managing egos.
Wrestling is a business built on confidence. Without it, a performer will never command a crowd or believe in their own larger-than-life persona. But what happens when that confidence morphs into something more toxic—when praise turns into arrogance and humility gives way to entitlement?
I learned this lesson the hard way.
Years ago, back when I ran the Appalachian Wrestling Federation, I had a young man on my roster who had it. You could see it in the way he moved in the ring, the natural charisma he had when he wasn’t overthinking everything. But something was missing—his self-confidence. He doubted himself constantly, and it was holding him back.
So, as any good promoter would, I stepped in. I tried to build him up. I told him how good he was, how much potential I saw in him. I thought that with the right encouragement, he’d finally rise to the level I knew he could.
But it backfired.
The more praise he got, the less humble he became. His head swelled. He stopped listening. He became difficult to book, constantly questioning decisions, showing up late, refusing to work with certain talent, and demanding more than he was worth. In the end, I had no choice—I let him go.
Years later, it happened again. This time, with a tag team. I tried to lift them up and make them feel important. Before long, they started believing they were the draw—not the show, not the promotion, them. And again, it ended in conflict and separation.
So what’s the takeaway here?
Promoters: Where Do You Draw the Line?
Encouragement is necessary. Talent, especially young or underutilized talent, needs to hear that they’re valued. But praise without accountability is dangerous. Here’s how I’ve learned to balance the two:
1. Encourage Performance, Not Persona
Praise work ethic, consistency, and match quality—not just the talent's "star potential." Compliment the results they bring, not the image they think they are. This keeps their focus on the grind, not the glory.
2. Be Specific With Feedback
Instead of blanket praise like, “You’re a star,” say, “That opening sequence was crisp, and the crowd popped big when you hit that comeback.” When feedback is detailed, it’s harder for talent to misinterpret it as blind worship.
3. Set Clear Expectations
Praise should always come hand-in-hand with expectations. If you’re building someone up, make sure they understand the responsibility that comes with it. Success in this business is earned, not gifted.
4. Stay the Promoter, Not the Fan
It’s easy to get excited about a breakout talent, but you’re not their cheerleader—you’re their boss. Keep a professional boundary. Don't overinvest emotionally in their potential to the point that you lose control when they cross a line.
5. Check-In Regularly
Have one-on-one meetings. Gauge their mindset. Are they still coachable? Are they taking liberties in the ring or in the locker room? Don’t wait until the locker room morale suffers—nip ego in the bud early.
6. Be Willing to Say “No”
Don’t be afraid to pull talent back down to earth. If someone’s getting too big for their boots, scale back their push, bench them, or have a serious talk. Respect is earned both ways.
Final Thoughts
There’s no blueprint for managing egos in pro wrestling. Every talent is different. Some need a push, others need a leash. The trick is knowing when to use each. As promoters, our job isn’t just to build stars—it’s to build a show, a locker room, and a promotion that can thrive long after the next big name walks out the door.
Encourage wisely. Praise carefully. And never forget—you’re the one running the show.
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